Pick up day......NOT

The starfish is sitting next to me eating cookies.  7 days ago I could not even imagine that.  God is good and answers the many prayers of His people.

My friend Karen came on this pick up trip with me and I have to say the trip itself was free of complications, just long as always.  We stopped in Canada and ate cheese burgers and fries.  Next stop was Frankfort Germany where we had Bratwurst.  Got to Sofia in the afternoon in time to have an evening meal at a little restaurant nearby.....Schnitzel.  It was Sunday and we were scheduled to be picked up by a taxi with our interpreter to fly to Burgas pick Monika up and bring her to Sofia.  We did not know we were going to have a complicated day.  On the way to the airport, we were told that Monika had been very sick and in the hospital since Friday (4 days).  A few minutes later, one of us started become panicked when she realized she had no idea where her passport and money bag was.  U-turn by taxi to go back to apartment.  After looking every where in apartment without finding it, we returned to taxi with a photocopy of the passport and original drivers license.  We did not think it would work, but had to head back to airport.  On way to airport, one more search of backpack revealed money bag with passport had slipped inside the inflatable airplane pillow holder.  We had it!

Got to airport in Sofia.  Plane was 1-1/2 hour delayed.  Interpreter kept getting calls from various people about Monika and things started to get confusing.  First we were told that I could check her out of hospital, but take her back to orphanage to rest in familiar place during day then pick her up for good in the evening on way to airport.  Our plane was not supposed to leave until 9 pm.  Next message said she had taken a bad turn, so would stay in hospital until I checked her out in evening.
Another message indicating the pick up may not be possible.  When we landed in Burgas, we went by taxi straight to the hospital.  She was in a neurology ward.  It was not visiting hours, which they enforce strictly.  The neurosurgeon got us past the guards.  When I saw Monika I was shocked at her condition.  She was thin when I saw her in Dec, but  now was skin and bones having not been able to eat for over a week.  She was on IV for fluids and still throwing up with horrible head pain.  Too weak to hold her head up but still trying her best to smile.  It was obvious to me, this would not be a pick up day.  The neuro surgeon came in and said while we were flying Monika had a seizure and cat scan revealed her shunt that was put in as an infant for hydrocephalus was not working and fluid was building up in the brain.  I spent the day with her and her caregivers.  A caregiver had to be with her 24 hours a day.  They were VERY loving to her and it was so good for me to see this and see how well she related to them.  Unfortunately, after a long day I had to return to Sofia without her.  That will be the subject of another blog.  Tuesday morning I received a call saying Monika had to have emergency surgery replacing shunt Monday after I left.

Monika on the Monday that should have been pick up day in the Hospital in Burgas.

Even in her weak state and in pain, she managed a smile for her mama :)

Finally going to pick up the starfish!!

There are so many emotions running high right now.  Monika legally became my daughter and her name was changed to Monika Grace Andrews.  She has a new birth certificate as proof of this change.  It is strange to know I have a daughter a world away and that I cannot pick her up and bring her home immediately.  The good news is, I have finally been given a date.  I will travel (along with my friend

Karen) two weeks from today.  Monika will walk out of the orphanage for good on Monday June 24th.

That is her Uncle Dave's birthday.  An exciting and appropriate "Gotcha Date" since Uncle Dave travelled with me on the first trip to meet her and has been 100% supportive the whole way. 

When I started this journey, I knew one thing.  I felt and still do feel God is calling me to make a difference to the life of an orphan.  I knew for me it was not about sending money or volunteering.  I have done both of those things, this was different.  I felt STRONGLY that this time, I was to bring one home.  In many ways, it makes no sense.  Why would a 50+ year old lady with epilepsy, 3 grown children and not a high income want to start over with another child?  Because I know deep in my heart that I was born for a time like this.  We all are called to a purpose and each of us has to make a decision at some point in our life if we are going to do what it takes to fulfill this purpose.

This has been a journey of extreme highs and lows, and I haven't even really started yet.  The real start date is June 24th.  I am so fortunate to have supportive family and friends that have helped, prayed and encouraged me along the way.  I have had much time for reflection and research.  I am glad I did not know in advance the difficulties I would encounter......I am a "Moses" in personality......do not like conflict and would prefer for someone to just let me know the plan.....the whole plan.  I thought I had it all figured out when I went into this, but do we ever have it all figured out.  I think not.

Friends and family have been so generous.  I feel like Monika has everything she needs.  Clothes, toys, her room, family, friends.  It will be extremely overwhelming to her at first.  For 9 years she only left the orphanage grounds when medical care was needed.  Now the orphanage she was moved into this past November, put her in a smaller and better environment, where she was able to attend school, but still extremely limited experience out of the orphanage.  She has to learn a new language, culture, how to live in a family, how to love, etc.  Because of these huge changes, her time out of the house will be

very limited at first.  We will not be going to church or other large group settings until she is settled in.

Visitors will be limited to a few family members and close friends that want to come one family at time.

I learned SOOO much from the "Empowered to Connect Conference".  The conference was eye opening on how to work with children that have never been in a family and had that experience of closely connecting to another person.  There will be many things I will be working with her on helping to make those connections.  The connections have to be made almost like that of an infant with the mom providing for all needs and creating a relationship where Monika will be totally dependent on me for all needs until we have established a trust where she know I will take care of her.  During this period, it is fine for others to talk to her and interact with her.  But all needs have to be met by me, specifically food/drink needs because that is an area that she has never had anyone totally meet that need for her.  If you want to understand more, google "Empowered to Connect" and listen to some of the videos or read information put out by Karyn Purvis.

Many have asked if there is anything else needed.  Most of what Monika needs when she gets home is already here.  Because of her lack of healthy food, it is recommended I offer her a healthy snack/juice every 2 hours.  Food will be a big practical need when we get home.  Snack crackers, fruits, fruit juice, yogurt, cheese, etc.   

Really the biggest need right now is finances.  All the final fees are due and I had enough to cover that, but because of the delays in paperwork, I am now flying at the most expensive time of year into Bulgaria.  The fees are double what I had to pay for the last trip.  This trip will cost over $5700 not including my Bulgarian country fees, food or some of the in country transportation costs.  I was not expecting this, but I do know that God was and He will provide.  God does not call us without providing what is needed to answer that call, so I am looking forward to seeing how He again shows that He is in control of the whole situation.  

I have gotten a few e-mails from my readers but would LOVE to hear from some of you.  When I hear your thoughts on the blog, it lets me know that I am not writing this for my own information, although it does help me to look back.  I would love to answer any questions or if you are considering adopting, I would love to pray for you.  Please pray for us as we begin this new phase of our journey.  I loved my short term mission trip to Russia.  I will always have fond memories of that special time and am so glad I went.  This is a long term mission trip.  Not an easy road to take, but a life time commitment.

Please pray for Monika's adjustment and my own as I dive back in to parenting.  Pray for wisdom in knowing how to meet her physical, emotional and spiritual needs.  Pray that our communication with each other will grow amazingly fast.  Pray for a strong bond in each of us, as I will have to go through the bonding process with her and she with me.  Pray our time in Bulgaria goes smoothly.

Thank you for loving us enough to pray through easy/good times and difficult times.